[Black Women Unmarried: The Saga Continues...]

Maybe I should start by saying that I have no idea where to even start with this one……Smh……However, I will say that the conniving media has done a great job as they once again continue their reports on the state of Black Women……All else that I can do is just shake my head sadly, and pose two questions. 1) What is the reasoning behind these continuos reports, and 2) Why do Feminists who strive for female independence cry out in times of loneliness…???

[Black Women Unmarried]

My quick thoughts surrounding the video and the topic at large are that; both black men and women need to truly humble themselves when it comes to the mating selection and when it comes to lifelong partnerships you cannot escape the study of traditional gender roles as they have their place in the overall bigger picture…

HERE’S MY TAKE, ON THE NEVER ENDING DEBATE…

Maybe I should start by brushing on a set of topics that have been debated on and spoken about since the dawn of mankind and will never be completely nullified or settled amongst a common ground between sexes; and these wonderful topics are none other than the Anatomy of the Female Psyche and Relationships…………At this stage in life as a young respectable man, I find it safe to say that I have had my fair share in both off-hand and on-hand experience in terms of relationships and the female psyche.

To start things off, it’s clear that men and women were created for each other and should therefore embody a mutual understanding for one another despite there being a host of sexual differences……Especially when the emotional aspects of love are entered into the equation……Right…???………………

I would say that this is in part very true, but only to a certain extent. Why, you ask??? Well let me explain……Speaking from a male stand point and based on my experiences and observations thus far, I would honestly and truthfully say that both sides of the playing field have there faults, bad habits, stigmas and strong aspects which all play a role in the continuous cycle of love and hate within relationships.

I’ve seen tons of documentaries, tv shows, movies, read articles (etc, etc, etc,) all about how some genius (whether they be male or female) thinks that they know “everything” about the opposite sex and decides that they are going to “teach” their sex how to deal with and treat the opposite sex in all situations and under any circumstances (Not that it’s bad to give advice if you think you’re an “expert”). But it never ends…….

But in all honesty, I kind of enjoy the numerous debatable factors of relationships and what not since it does help achieve a sense of understanding especially when you end up in one of those late night “battle of the sexes” talks with a bunch of friends from both sexes.

But think about it…While standing in line at the grocery, you glance down at a women’s magazine and what do most of the headline side topics usually say? Something along the lines of “Ten Ways to Please Your Man“, “Dr So-and-So’s Secret Dating Tips“……..And even on some men’s magazine you’ll see, “Want to Know What She’s Thinking”, “10 Rules About Women” and so on and so forth. Ironically, divorce rates are still rising, along with abortion rates and the number of single parent homes………(Hmm…Now isn’t that strange……???)

I wish I or someone new the specific answer to all this, but all I have is my intuition and opinion. And at this stage this topic could take a turn in any direction, so I’ll lay out the main topic that I wanted to touch on, which is my recent analogy on women based on my won experiences and observations (So don’t take anything I say personal or the wrong way, but feel free to disagree)

In my eyes it is just as difficult to find a good women as it is to find a good man. Yet society tends to lean more towards giving women the benefit of the doubt of portraying things as though it is mostly only difficult to find a good man.

Now, not wanting to sound biased or egotistical, but I wound place myself in the “good man” category and speak for that side of the spectrum. Even though the question of what exactly a “good man” or a “good woman” is can be dissected all around, since everyone has their own take on it all, but that’s a topic for another day.

Time and time again has the simple scenario when the jock, pretty boy, and/or braggadocio testosterone filled meat head gets the beautiful, intelligent and well-rounded female while the “other guy” (the good man) sits on the sidelines waiting to only eventually get the girl in the end and be inducted into the “Good Guys Finish Last” Hall-of-Fame with the quote from his new female “Where Have You Been All My Life” inscribed onto the bottom of his plague…………Why must this most commonly have to be the case???……Who knows……..But it shouldn’t……..And why do women (and I don’t mean ALL women) continue to feed into the same stigmatic cycle…….For some magical reason women tend not to like or appreciate “nice guys” as they flee from men who treat them like queens claiming that “he was being way to nice” which for some reason gets symbolized as a sign of weakness and flock to the thugs, jocks, and pretty boys who have their first dibs pick of the crop or available females……….Boggles my mind really….

This leads into my next point and my analogy on women. A “good girl” (or a Prime, which I personally like to refer to them as) is in my definition a female who is well-rounded both mentally and physically, and yes that includes all of the basic traits that almost all human beings say they look for in a partner (Smart, Funny, Attractive, Great Personality, Loving, Understanding, Spiritual and the list goes on and on). But in basic terms, my recent thought process has led to my analogy that women are like cars. Now let me paint this picture for you.

A gentleman (good man) who has been car-less makes his way to the car dealership in search of a new car; one which will suit him perfectly as an individual based on his preferences and what he has to offer. And sitting there in the corner of the lot is a brand new “________” (fill in the blank, Ferrari, Benz, or whatever you want it to be)…..And he says to himself, “that’s the one for me“……..However………He is no where near able to afford it but is still well deserving of it…….So he says to himself….”You know what…….I’ll work hard, and come back in the future when I will hopefully be able to earn the privilege of having that vehicle….”

So later on down the line in the future after an ample amount of hard work and dedicated efforts, the man returns to the dealership as he is now more than capable of purchasing the car…….He proudly makes his way back to the car that he has all along known in his heart is right for him, only to be greeted with the site of that same car, exactly the same way he left, but labelled with a much cheaper price…………Why is it being showcased with a reduced price??? Because a bunch of other men have already test driven, bought, used, and returned the car………………………………………………………….

Same car…But not the same car……………

I’ll leave things at that for now………So now, what do you think…???

“I think I fall in love with at least 3 strangers everyday…” – Kev